#51 My husband just asked nicely.

I’ve been doing ok lately, I don’t have the energy that I want to have but I was able to go across the street to my new neighbor’s house and help her with her weeds the day before yesterday, hopefully I’ll be able to spend some time in my own yard too but that’s gonna have to wait a few days so that my brand new sunburn fades a little bit. I had my best friend Diane over all day yesterday so that I could pass on what little I know about crocheting to her and she brought Rick and I home-made vegetable beef soup for dinner. That probably doesn’t sound like much for the average person to do in a day but it took everything I had to stay awake until seven or so and I think I fell asleep still holding my book. I was very surprised at the number of people who were upset at the fact that I was considering not keeping this blog anymore, oddly enough the ones who I didn’t want to upset were the ones who don’t want me to stop writing so that was a bit confusing. I went to the grocery store not long ago and bought myself a five subject note-book to write down what I wanted to say without showing the world everything that I was thinking, I thought that would fix everything. I could just keep my note-book to myself and not worry at all about what I was putting in “my book”.  I still have a brand new note-book . Well, I’ve been thinking about the reason for this blog and my reasons for the decisions that I make about everything. I’ve considered keeping my thoughts to myself but I’m afraid that if I try to do that my head will just explode from all the pressure. The reality check I had because of this was that I’m not going to be here forever to help fix everyone’s problems so I need to get the ones who rely on me the most to work out their issues on their own now so that they’ll be able to do that on their own later on. Rick and I were watching tv the other day and out of nowhere he asked me to start writing my blog again. He said that he likes to read it even though he knows everything that’s going on as I find out, he likes to see what I write, he didn’t make a big deal about it, he just asked me nicely. I was very surprised that he was even reading my blog because I usually talk to him while I’m writing and ask his opinion on just about everything before I post it so there was nothing new for him to read about. He explained to me that he could see how me writing down everything that I’m thinking was helping me get through some very tough times and that he thought that it would be a mistake for me to stop doing what was helping me get through everything.  He’s right, as he usually is about what I should do. So I’m back at my keyboard, and I’ve been given a direct order to stay out of the sun today. I woke up in the middle of the night and wasn’t able to get back to sleep so even though I went to bed early, I only actually slept for a few hours. I hope that doesn’t mean that I’ll need a nap this afternoon or I won’t sleep through the night again tonight. Rick made me eggs and toast to go with my coffee for breakfast and he just left to spend some time with his friend this morning. It’s very quiet in the house and I have absolutely nothing to do but relax and maybe watch a movie. Oh yeah…and we both quit smoking last week so it doesn’t hurt so much to breath. Go figure.


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