#96 Slow motion


I’m scheduled to have my PET scan today so that I can give my doctors and insurance company the information that they want, but it seems like I’m in slow motion lately. I wasn’t planning on ever having any more tests done but I don’t have a choice if I want to be able to handle things my way. They have to give me a shot of glucose to high-light anything cancerous so I haven’t been able to eat anything since I had an early dinner last night so I’m starving right now. I was told that I could have eggs and bacon if I woke up early enough but I think it’s too late to eat anything now. I can drink all the water that I want though and thank God for that because yesterday it was 114 outside. I have no idea how hot it’s going to be today but I’m sure it will be about the same as yesterday. Yesterday the tech called me to tell me that they hadn’t gotten the supplies that the nurse will need to hook up my IV and they rescheduled my scan for next week, but then she called me back a few minutes later and told me that she had just gotten the delivery and I could still come in today if I wanted to. Although I don’t want to know what this scan is going to show, I’ve been in a hurry to get it over with. It seems like every time I have to go to the doctor or have any kind of testing done the days start to slow down considerably. I just want to get this over with now. I’ve had a few places that have been making me worry and I think that  knowing for sure that anything more is going wrong is only going to make me more upset about it. Ignorance is definitely bliss as far as I’m concerned. I would rather not know if it’s only bad news but it doesn’t seem like I’m not going to be able to get away with that. It could be good news though, stranger things have happened but then again this is me we’re talking about so that brings me right back to just wanting to get this scan over and done with. I don’t have very much pain today and although I can’t drink my coffee this morning I don’t feel very tired so I think I’ll be ok to get through this today. I just heard yesterday that a friend of mine had broken her hip in two places and because she has bone mets I’m sure she’s having a lot of pain from it, so my little pains don’t seem so bad to me. I know all too well how much worse I could feel. Hopefully I can get myself doing something…anything to keep my mind off everything until I have to leave for my appointment in a couple of hours. I know that once I’m done and back home again I’ll feel much better and maybe even get some things done around the house. I’ve been saying I was going to vacuum the downstairs for the past three days so that’s probably where I’ll start. I have a few plants that need to be moved so that they are exposed to more sunlight too so that’s another small thing I can do. Too bad I don’t have a fast-forward button that would shoot me right into dinner time tonight. Then I could just skip over the scan all together. I’ve been craving sweets again…I feel like mixing up a  carrot cake with cream cheese frosting, but Rick would need to make sure that I didn’t sit down and try to eat the whole thing all by myself. I don’t think he would mind saving me from a cake.


8 thoughts on “#96 Slow motion

  1. Best wishes for your day. Could Rick vacuum for you? I know my wife has very severe chronic pain. She seems obsessed with vacuuming (we have a Yellow Lab) but it is very exhausting for her to vacuum. Perhaps tending to those flowers is enough for the day….

    • Gary
      I suppose if I were to ask Rick to vacuum he would but I want to try first and see how far I can get. It makes me feel needed when I’m able to do things on my own but when I’m not up to the task I don’t hesitate to ask for help. Maybe I can burn some carrot cake by doing a few chores?

      • I can never vacuum to my wife’s satisfaction…but I know it is one thing that gives her the satisfaction of a clean house. I do hope you get that yummy carrot cake. My favorite!

      • Thanks Gary…Rick went to the store while I was having the scan done and bought me a cake mix so I’m going to make some cupcakes this afternoon. You are a wonderful husband to understand why she likes things the way she does. It shows that you pay attention to her needs. I bet that alone makes her very happy.

  2. Hi Hun, I hope you get good results and your treating yourself well.

    Me, I’m on morphine and painkillers as my throat is burnt and I can’t drink or eat. Feel like this shit is never bloody ending but hey only four more burns to go.

    Keep smiling or if your like me ( not )

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