#130 Surgery canceled…Go figure

I have had an interesting week. I was having a lot of pain in my chest right under my sternum that went clear through to my back  and it didn’t get any better after taking my pain pills and resting so Rick had to call an ambulance. I knew it didn’t have anything to do with my heart but the EMTs always have to assume that it is a heart attack and treated me like it was. I spent a long time in the er and had more tests and scans that I can even remember, and what they found was that I have a pulmonary embolism, which is a fancy name for a blood clot in my lungs. They started giving me shots of blood thinners that gave me terrible bruises on my stomach the size of soft balls, so after about two days of that I made them stop giving them to me. The Dr told me that the blood clot was caused by my breast cancer and that it wasn’t unusual, although I haven’t heard of very many people having this happen. They decided that because I have so many things wrong with me that it was best if I went back on hospice care. I have been planning on going back on hospice but not for a while yet.  I did talk to someone from hospice and agreed that they could do the intake paperwork again but that I wouldn’t actually go back onto their service until I felt like I needed to. I am still happy with the care that I’m getting from my primary Dr and my pain Dr so I really don’t think that I should be on hospice until my current Dr.s can’t control my pain anymore. I feel a little bit better now although I still feel pain where the blood clot is. I was told that if I move around more and try to start exercising again that it would probably go away on its own. The blood thinners they wanted me to take would cause more problems than I’m willing to deal with and wouldn’t make the current blood clot go away any faster but it would help to keep me from getting another one. I would rather start going for my walks again than take blood thinners. I’m hoping that I can get used to walking(in my wheelchair) every morning, it is a lot cooler here in the mornings now so I think that it’ll be nice to get out in the mornings again. I won’t be having surgery to try to remove the tumor like I had planned because it would be too dangerous so I’ll have to try again in a month or so. Hopefully it won’t take very long for this thing to go away so I can have the surgery. I’m so happy to be home again, they wanted to keep me in the hospital and send me straight into inpatient hospice but I actually laughed at the Dr when he suggested that I do that. I’m so used to having so many things wrong with me that this is just one more thing on my medical records to me. I figure that as long as I am able to be at home and have my pain under control then there is no reason for me to be inpatient. I actually had to tell the Dr yesterday that he had fifteen minutes to get my discharge paperwork ready for me to sign or I was leaving AMA. He looked at me like I was crazy but I was just laying in bed watching tv all day and they weren’t doing anything for me that I can’t do at home. They did have everything ready for me to sign in that fifteen minutes. I have an appointment coming up in a few days with my pain Dr so I’ll have to explain all of this to him, I tried to get the hospital to call him and let him know that I was there but even the hospital Dr couldn’t get around his office girls so he has no clue that anything is even wrong with me. What I wouldn’t give for a normal life. I’m so jealous of people who never get sick, and when they have any pain they just take a Tylenol and everything is all better. But then again, what would I have to write about. 😉  Maybe it isn’t a blood clot at all…maybe it’s just an M&M that got stuck? It’s so nice to be back at home where I belong.


12 thoughts on “#130 Surgery canceled…Go figure

  1. Hi Cin! Well….I said a string of *very* unladylike words when I found out about the PE. I am really sorry, but so glad they figured out what was going on and did such a thorough check, not just sending you home in pain and puzzled.

    I think home is the best place for you, too, surrounded by your people and your stuff. I would feel the same exact way. I hope you get through to your pain doc and explain what’s up. Can’t believe he has so many gate guards around him, but maybe it’s necessary for that line of work. Not everyone is like you! 🙂

    I love how you told them to get your paperwork together because you were leaving in 15 minutes. I wish I was a fly on the wall for that one! Too funny.

    Just reading your post made me smile. I love your spirit and it’s rare, believe me! I’ve meet a lot of people in my life, living all over the world and the country, in all sorts of circumstances from the best to the most dire, and you are a one-of-a-kind! I can honestly say I will handle everything life throws at me with better humor and grace because of your example. Thanks for hanging out with us here in cyberspace. 🙂

    xx from your friend

    • Jenni,
      I have to admit that when I gave him fifteen minutes to get the discharge papers ready I didn’t think that it was even possible to get it done that quickly. What was funny was that after being there for a few days the nurses started bringing me gifts, Flowers and puzzle books and a book mark for my study bible…I think they were entertained by me telling the Drs what I would and wouldn’t agree to do. I was even given a VIP room which is about three times the size of a regular room. I felt like I was in a very nice hotel. But I still wanted to just come home. I like the idea that my sense of humor can help other people get through things a little easier. I just can’t help but be a smart ass…especially when it takes people off guard. It makes me happy so to mess with people. 🙂

      • You are right. It is the thing that means the differences between dark and light!

        I am not doing well. I’m in a lot of pain in my lower back and left hip. X-rays are clean and show no fracture or anything. I’m beside myself. Am I going crazy? The oncologist has recommended that we repeat the PET scan to see if there has been disease progression. I feel so foolish. Lots of pain and nothing there. Cripes, I need a freaking cane!

      • Susan,
        You are NOT crazy. If you feel pain then there is something wrong. Even if nothing shows up on the scans there could very well be something that isn’t cancer related like a problem with muscles, nerves, bruised bone or whatever but pain is very real whether or not your Dr can see it. I also have pain in my back and hips but mine is from the way I move in my wheelchair and walk on my crutches and it never shows up on scans. It’s probably a good idea to re-do the scans and I hope that there isn’t progression there. You should be getting good pain relief no matter what is causing it so I hope that you are getting enough of the right pain meds. Getting a cane might help take some pressure off the area that hurts. I really do hope that you get some answers soon because not knowing what’s wrong can make you crazy.
        All my love to you my friend,

    • Heather,
      Thank you. It’s starting to feel normal for me to have something crazy happen. I hope that I help other people try to keep a good attitude although I have been known to lose it myself sometimes. 😉

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