Tag Archive | Medicine

#146 Humility, my own lesson with it

My take on life is most likely not what everyone else sees. Things that used to be very important to me are way back in the background, and different things are up front now. First lets take my morning routine. I wake up a little later now than I used to because I get up every few hours throughout the night. After each four-hour ‘nap’ I try to do one or two things that I would have before waited for the afternoon to get working on. Then there’s sleep its self. I have to take pills for this that and the other(right now I have pneumonia again) that usually makes me a little sleepy so the four-hour sleep thing actually works out fine. I would have thought that only sleeping in four-hour intervals would make me tired all the time, but it gives me a little bit of time after each four hours to do a few things. This morning I woke up and had a cup of coffee and read a few pages of my book and decided that I might have enough energy left to knock out a quick post.

I know I’ll have to write it quickly because I’m already getting tired, hopefully the coffee will help with that so that I can stay up a while longer. I have my M&Ms too so one more cup of coffee and I’ll be fine . I have a friend who I haven’t seen in a few months that showed up a few days ago and wanted to know if it was all right if she came to stay with me for a while to help with all of the housework and to keep me company. It’s nice to have people come over to see what they can do to help us out. We need help all the time so we have friends coming and going throughout the days. Some just come to keep me company and those are the ones who can’t help with any other needs. I think that kind of help is so precious. I’m not one who normally likes to have a lot of people around the house because I’m embarrassed that my house isn’t always clean anymore. That doesn’t seem important these days. I told her that she’s welcome to come and help out for a while. She should be here sometime today.

Then we have the bills. I can’t ever find the words to convey how embarrassing it is to have to admit that we can’t make ends meet anymore. I’ve always hated having to admit that we need help but I’m putting my pride away and asking for help in different ways. First we just signed up for state services for food and health insurance for Rick, he needs to be able to keep taking care of his heart. He went for over a week without taking his heart pills and never told me because he knew we had no way to come up with enough money to pay for his meds. We now have decided that we can’t just go without some things.

I’m setting up a way for people to help us financially if they want to. I think Elaine is working on a way for people to help in different ways. Some want to mail a check and some want to pay bills directly, and some just want to send cash or a money order. Elaine will make sure that if you want to help financially then it will be excepted in whatever form you wish. I think that letting people send us money is right up there at the top of embarrassing/humiliating. I’ve come to accept that it’s alright for me to say when we need help, and boy do we need help! Like I’ve said before we have helped so many other families when we were able to over the years and I wish I knew how hard it was for the people we were helping. I always just figured that they were happy to have some financial relief and that was the end of it. Well, that is so not the end of it. I remember feeling so happy about giving people whatever they needed, but I think that now its my time to learn how other people feel about having to except charity. Thank God we’ve never had or used credit cards, I don’t like to make payments on things, so if we didn’t have the cash to purchase anything we just saved up for things.

I think that I missed this entire Christmas season because I did everything but hide in my bed to stay away from people. I wanted my family to have a good time, but I think that I could have helped to make it a better holiday, even without any money. I know that my mood swings are coming from all the meds and the pain I’m going through. I’m so used to having a lot of pain but this is way more than what I’ve ever had to deal with…and it’s only going to get worse. I did finally get my mother to agree to take me to make my final arrangements while I’m able to have a say in everything. Of course I have a long time to go yet but I didn’t want to wait until I can’t go with the family to choose what I want. Rick and mom need to make theirs as well. I don’t think that anyone should wait until their too sick to go and have a say in their own final wishes.

I might think about things differently now but it’s only because I don’t want all the difficult things left for other people to take care of. My muscles are all very stiff when I wake up…every time I wake up, but then it gets a little better as I get up and move around a little bit. I get very excited when I’m able to finish any chore on my own, and I make sure that everyone in the house at the time knows that I accomplished something on my own. Here is a recent pic that was taken just hours before my sister Elaine left to go back go back to NC.:

Myself and Elaine


Great News!

That wonderfully delicate balance of pain meds has been reached!  I feel so relieved that now things will begin a new “normal”.  I get to work tomorrow so it’ll be in the late evening before I can post again, but I’m looking forward to Cindy’s input & responses to your comments. Today’s the first day things have been well regulated, so tomorrow will be a day spent resting. Who couldn’t use a day of rest? LOL

Check back tomorrow late evening for an update!

Oh, and do a Happy Dance for Cindy!



The Sun’s Shining

Hey, Everyone!

Cindy is feeling better -guess that happens when you eat, drink and get outside for sunshine! hehehe Her doctor is still working on getting her pain meds regulated -the new pain meds made her hyper active after taking it, so they decided to add another to counter that side effect because the pain med is the right one for her pain relief. Now they need to find the delicate balance.

I’ll try to get back with you all later!



and the Cycle Repeats ….

So, after a couple of days with the nurses taking good care of Jess, the ‘Wrath of a Sick Child’s Mother” was unleashed yet again today. A doctor came in and decided that it was time to ween Jess from her IV pain meds and have her take them by pill …. nothing else needs to be said -well, after you consider this:

Jess has been in the hospital for about a week, she’s had surgery, and in worse shape now than when she was admitted. Jess can’t even have water in her mouth because it burns (water!). She tried pudding yesterday & it had to be suctioned out, she couldn’t swallow it. No sprite, no Ensure -just little bits of an icee now and then. It’s been almost 3 days now and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better.

Back to the Doctor’s decision, she wanted to have Jess start taking pain meds by pills! Cindy let loose, apparently -while in the Presidential Suite- an angry Mom screaming at the doctor, crying in frustration, that her daughter is getting worse under their care and that there’s a malpractice attorney on retainer changes things a bit. Nothing has been ‘normal’ since they were admitted, so now it’s time to think outside the box. Treat Jess as an individual, not a statistic. Evaluate how she is responding and adjust already!!!  After all the dust settled, the doctor determined that perhaps increasing the pain meds (by IV) would allow Jess to continue to try to swallow things with less pain and just maybe get some type of nutrition in her.  Toradol (sp?) has been added to the IV & is supposed to help with inflammation, pain and something else and the surgeon due back in to check on things Monday.

I’m outta here for now -gotta go enjoy the best mood I have been in for years! May you all have wonderful days ahead soon!

Jess is recovering … I think


Hello Everyone, it’s Elaine, Cindy’s sister ~I’m back to help out a bit =0)

I’m writing for Cindy because she’s staying in the hospital with Jess. Jess agreed -after Cindy convinced her- to let the doctors remove her tonsils and anything else that was infected in the area. Apparently, it was a lot of search & remove, because the pain Jess is in now is terribly incredibly awful. They removed her tonsils, adenoids and poked around in her sinuses so the infected stuff is gone, but in their place ~serious pain. Cindy said to think of your worst pain and it’s 10 times worse! The doctors said following the surgery, that Jess may be able to go home in about 2 days -which is great news for Jess, since she wants to go Trick or Treating with a very special young man.

Now to back up a little, in Cindy’s last post, she talked about how Jess got to the hospital. No need to go over that again! But this whole illness is baffling to even the Infectious Disease doctor! They put Jess on IV antibiotics and steroids and after 2 days she wasn’t getting better, but worse! Jess was waking up every once in a while screaming in pain, so Cindy had them hook up the pain meds where Jess could push a button to give herself pain meds. That helped somewhat -she was still hurting terribly! They ran all kinds of tests, nothing was indicated in her blood work. In fact, that doctor came in the room, threw his arm up and said he didn’t have any idea what was wrong with Jess! After more scans they finally gave her a different kind of antibiotic for bronchitis and that helped some.

So things were looking better! The four friends Jess hangs out with came to visit -and to be cautious, they all wore masks and gloves. They goofed around took pic’s and joked about it being funny with Halloween coming up & them being in costumes. Jess’s best friend was going to spend the night with her, yesterday, after the surgery, so Cindy could go home and get some rest (she is sooo beyond exhausted). Cindy hadn’t heard from her, so she called her mother to see what time Rick should go pick her up & Wham! Two of the girls who came to visit are sick like Jess. Cindy told the mother to be sure to tell the doctors at Urgent Care about Jess & and that the CDC is involved trying to determine what is going on.

So, Cindy’s still at the hospital with Jess. Mom and Rick did bring her some home cooked food they ate in the cafeteria, ‘though!  Rick joked and said he got all dressed up to go out to eat at the Thunderbird cafeteria! Speaking of eating! Cindy says the only thing Jess has been able to eat is the hospital pudding that comes in a can from the kitchen -not the snack size ones that they have on the hospital floors because there’s something in them that burns the back of her throat- and Sprite! I actually talked with Jess the other day & she said the Sprite kind of tickled the back of her throat with the bubbles LOL. No other drink works, but she’s got Sprite.

Well, that about covers things through late last night. I will relay your comments today -please know we appreciate all of your kind wishes & prayers.